Guest Post: 15 Things To Remind Yourself Of When Life Seems Overwhelming And Difficult

Hello guys,

Raise your hand if this year has been rough. Yeah, I know. We’ve all had a rough year. Some of us have had a rough few years. Now, do me a favour and put your hand on your chest. Do you feel that? That’s called life. Your heart hasn’t stopped beating to keep you alive, so don’t waste any more of it feeling sorry for yourself. There’s time for everything in this life. There’s time to mourn, cry, to be angry, to feel indifferent, but there’s also time to laugh, hug, kiss, and dance. If you’ve been moping for a while, maybe it’s time you remind yourself of these things and finally start living life more fully.

1. You’re more than just your body.

You have a mind, a soul and a heart. The outside is just the tip of the iceberg. There’s so much more in you that people love than what’s on the outside. Put more focus on what’s inside and let that beauty flourish from the inside out.

2. You can do anything.

If you focus and plan, you’ll surely reach those goals. It’ll take work, but it’ll feel good to know that hard work and helping yourself was your key to success.

3. You’re the only person who can make you happy.

No one else can make you happy, nor can you fill voids in the happiness department with material things. You and only you can control your level of happiness.

4. Problems have solutions.

Take a moment. Breathe. Think. Analyze. Plan. Solve. You can do it.

5. Is your problem really that big or are you being dramatic?

Stop and assess. Don’t waste energy on worrying about something not worth worrying about.

6. Be thankful for your support system.

No matter how big or how small, you’re part of a community of people who love you. Appreciate them and give thanks that you have someone to turn to.

7. You’re not alive to impress anyone.

Life is not about fitting in or making people like you because of how you look or what you have. Social media is full of liars and the moment you understand that, the lesser you’ll feel like impressing anyone.

8. Do things for yourself.

If you like it, do it. If it makes you feel good, do it. If it makes you happy, do it. If it makes you feel empowered, do it.

9. Life has a long list of good things ready for you.

You may be in a rut now, but that won’t be forever. Life always gives us sweet surprises. Be on the lookout.

10. Failing doesn’t mean it’s over.

You may have failed 1,000 times and feel like giving up. That’s ok. If you don’t want to give up and know you want to continue persevering, that’s also ok. It’s not over until you say it is.

11. People love you, so why don’t you love yourself?

We have this tendency to constantly self-deprecate. We under-value and under-appreciate ourselves, when the people we know value and love us. If they can love you, you can definitely love yourself too.

12. Life doesn’t suck as much as you think it does.

If we look hard enough, finding the bright side to life isn’t all that hard. Count your blessings, literally. Write them down and be amazed. Your life isn’t that bad.

13. You’re not alone.

We’re all on this journey together. And yes, life can seem easier for some and harder for others, but a wise man once said, “the sun rises for both good and evil”. You’ll get a fair shot at the things you want, but in the meantime, rest assured that everyone is fighting for something. You’re not an isolated case.

14. Messing up just means you’re human.

Congrats, you’re not a robot, or an alien, or a fictional character. You’re a real, live person who stumbles. Dust yourself off and start over. It’s that simple.

15. Don’t deprive yourself of anything lovely.

Never deny yourself the opportunity to love, eat, dance, sing, cry, shout, etc. Go. See new places, make new friends, try new things. Life is short and isn’t meant to be rationed.

Source: Much credit to Fernanda

You Never Know What God Has In Store For You, But It’s Always Better Than You Think

You never know why God picked a certain path for you even if it didn’t make sense to you or even if you thought that it was unfair or too painful. You never know why God made you fight certain battles alone or why he made you lose those battles. You never know why he picked someone else for something you wanted or a dream you wished for, but you should know that what he has in store for you is always way better than anything you could have imagined for yourself.

You never know why his delays or his timing or his plans did not align with yours, but you should know that with time, you are going to realize that you didn’t need what you wanted back then, that they were juvenile wishes or dreams from an unhealed or an immature version of you. You are going to change and evolve and your dreams and passions will change and you will thank God that you were not stuck with an old dream or an old story that would have been wrong for you.

You never know why God pushed you away from some people or pushed certain people away from you. It may not make sense at first, you may even feel like you lost an irreplaceable friend or partner or the love of your life, but you should know that only God knows what the future holds, and maybe down the line this friendship or relationship would have been toxic for you or would have made you suffer. You never know why God broke your heart or why he took the ones you loved away from you, but you should know that the reason behind every heartbreak is to somehow heal you in another way. Whether it’s self-love or inner strength or wisdom, one way or another, your heartbreak taught you something valuable about yourself or your life that you wouldn’t have learned otherwise.

You never know why God tested you with the things that meant the most to you or the things you thought you couldn’t live without, but you should know that every time you think you lost something special, God has something outstanding in store for you. Every time you go after a blocked road or a closed door, God has an even better one wide open for you. Every time you chase someone who doesn’t love you or appreciate you or someone who isn’t right for you, God is saving you from a lifetime of pain and regret because he has someone perfect for you.

The truth is, you never know what God has in store for you, but from what I have seen in my own life and what I have learned when my life didn’t go as planned, all along God had a totally different vision for my life, and now I know that what I wanted for myself would have destroyed me. You never know how many doors God is willing to close to protect you, but you also never know how many doors he’s willing to open to bless you with things you never even dreamed of.

Sooner or later you are going to realize that what God has in store for you is always better than anything you could have imagined for yourself.

Much credit goes to Rania Naim

Don’t Feel Guilty For Doing What’s Best For Yourself

This is a guest post.

Don’t feel guilty for cutting toxic people out of your life. Even if you love them, even if you had wonderful times with them in the past, you have to do what’s right for yourself today. Remember, even though you might be the person ending the relationship, you’re not the reason this has to happen. They brought it onto themselves. It’s their fault. Not yours. You have to do what is best for yourself. You have to put yourself first, even when it hurts.

Don’t feel guilty for putting yourself first, especially when it comes to your mental health. You’re allowed to be selfish. You’re allowed to make decisions that benefit you, even if they upset the people around you. It doesn’t matter if anyone else understands or respects your decision. All that matters is that you care about yourself enough to do what is best for yourself. You should never sacrifice your mental health for anyone else. After all, if they really cared about you, they would encourage you to do whatever you need to do.

Don’t feel guilty for disappointing other people, even the people you love. You can’t make career choices, relationship choices, or any general life choices based on what your parent or partner wants from you. You need to do what brings you the most happiness. There’s no reason to make them happy if it means making yourself miserable. When it comes to your life, your emotions and your opinions are the most important.

Don’t feel guilty for causing conflict. If someone upsets you, you don’t have to pretend everything is fine to keep the peace. You don’t have to act polite when someone is completely disrespecting you. You’re allowed to speak your mind and say what’s wrong. You’re allowed to call people out when they cross an unforgivable line. You shouldn’t feel pressured to stay quiet when you’re suffering on the inside.

Don’t feel guilty about saying no when your plate is full. Even though you have a kind heart, you can’t help everyone who asks for a hand. You don’t want to burn yourself out to please someone else. Sometimes, you need to let others down. Sometimes, you need to do what makes the most sense for you instead of running around, trying to entertain everyone else.

Remember, you’re allowed to be selfish, but this doesn’t mean you need to walk around, only caring about yourself. This doesn’t mean you should say and do whatever you want without any regard for the people around you. This doesn’t mean you’re allowed to disrespect your family and friends. It only means that you shouldn’t let people walk over you. You shouldn’t let others make your decisions for you. You shouldn’t assume family members and friends know you better than you know yourself.

Don’t feel guilty for doing what’s best for yourself. Don’t hesitate to do what makes you the happiest because, at the end of the day, you’re the only person you can rely on.

Guest: Holly Riordan

Image source: Adobe stock

This Is Me Trying

I am far from complete. I am an unfinished manuscript, collecting dust on a forgotten shelf. I am merely half a canvas, splattered paint that is yet to be a masterpiece. And that’s okay with me. Why would I want to be complete? That would mean the world was done with me.

I have not been sculpted to perfection yet, my fine details are still to be sketched. I would not want to rush the process of perfection, I do not wish for my metamorphosis to be instantaneous.

I want the world to take its time with me. Mold my soul with patience and attentiveness, Lead me to walk through darkness when I am convinced there is no light. Teach me lessons that will shape me into the final version of who I am to be.

I care very little for immediate perfection. I know that society is obsessed with getting it right from the start and I am sorry if I come across as self-righteous, but you’re wrong.

Life is about living. Living is about trying. Trying and learning; never failing. Failing suggests that nothing came of it. There is always a purpose, always a lesson to be learned. This obsession with perfection will only cause you pain; I speak from experience. I, too, wanted everything, now. I almost demanded it, trying to manifest it at my feet. But that is not how this works. If you believe that is the unquestionable truth, you will not live. Seeing lessons as failures will only fill your life with frustration and misery. Perfection is only attainable when our manuscripts are complete. Perfection is within that finished masterpiece.

To live is to try. Those lessons you see as imperfections, they are the words that fill your manuscripts and the brush strokes that create your masterpiece. Trying is the meaning of life. Because we are human. Humans are not perfect. We are never always right and mistakes are what make us individuals.

Your soul is a constellation of imperfections. Imperfections that resulted from a lifetime of trying.

And maybe perfection is not attainable when we reach our conclusions; not in the way you believe perfection to be. Perfection is when you have learned and absorbed every possible thing that life had to offer you. Perfection is closing your eyes for the final time, accumulating every imperfection you collected over the years. Perfection is having spent a lifetime trying.

This is me being dedicated to trying. Trying to learn from those sweet imperfections I am committed to loving. This is me trying to enjoy the process of my chapters being written. This is me trying to live.

Source: Dakota Geduld

Image Credit: Adobe Stock

Physical Appearance Should Not Be The Most Attractive Thing About You

I am not sure of you but in my opinion, the most attractive people are the ones who know that their physical appearance isn’t the most attractive thing about them. They have a certain kind of confidence, they’re usually more fun to hang out with, and they’re the kind of people who are ready to love you for who you are. Not what you are.

Body image is no light subject. There are people who are suffering legitimate illnesses, mental and physical, relating to how they appear.

At the bare minimum, I assume, everybody feels as though they are sub-par at some point, in some way. I am in no way trying to diminish the suffering that people experience regarding their physical appearances. I just hope that, if even for a few minutes, you can hear me out.

I think that attraction that is not physical can end up being physical eventually, when you really grow to care about someone. Listen, I’m not going to kid and say personal grooming and cleanliness aren’t important, they obviously are. But at the end of the day, you need to be with someone who wants you for who you are, and respects how you want to present yourself. Not someone who wants you to look like they want you to.

How you choose to present yourself does say something about you, we can’t pretend it doesn’t. But one of the most powerful things it can say is that you care enough to take care of yourself, but you still know that it’s not the only thing great about you.

It always gets to me when I hear guys admit that they’re ashamed or concerned about their appearance. I guess it’s because I’m so used to hearing girls lament the subject, hearing that guys do as well is both refreshing (whoa, we’re all human? We all feel this way?!) guys you don’t need to be chiseled to be loved or admire. You only need to be confidence in your looks and skin. But equally disturbing because it’s so unfortunate that anyone has to think like that. Guys/Ladies are looking for real, loving, genuine, kick-ass people who lift others up and make them happy. If you are interested in girls (or guys) who are made happy by how in shape you are, it may be time to look elsewhere. (Fact)

The point is, even if you’ll never be able to be completely satisfied with how you look, you don’t have to be to still be a perfectly worthy and beautiful person. Love yourself for everything inside you, and you’ll be able to find someone else who does as well.

Most credit goes to Brianna Weist. My professional and senior colleague.

Image credit Adobe stock

Sometimes It’s a Blessing That You Didn’t Get What You Prayed For

This is a guest post.

When I look back on some of the things I prayed for in the past, I feel lucky and grateful that they didn’t happen because now that I know better, some of the things I prayed for would have ruined my life. You see, it’s not that God didn’t answer your prayer, he answered it by not giving it to you. It was his way of telling you that this is not going to serve you and one day you will know exactly why.

Sometimes it’s a blessing that it didn’t work out with someone you wanted to be with because they weren’t good for you or they had circumstances that you wouldn’t have been able to live with because you hear what people say about them now or you see what kind of partner they are and you get why God didn’t make it happen. Sometimes it doesn’t work out because you were meant to find someone better for you or make room for them to show up.

Sometimes it’s a blessing that you didn’t get the job you wanted because you didn’t know what kind of environment you were going to be in and it pushed you to be creative and look outside your field or your comfort zone and you found something that motivated you more, something you were more passionate about and something you can actually make a difference in. There’s always a bigger reason why you weren’t granted your wishes and the reason is always valid and serving your best interest.

Sometimes God doesn’t answer your prayer the way you want to but he answers them in his own way. Maybe that looks like rejection or failure or heartbreak or injustice in the beginning but when you accept that reality and start moving on with your life, you look back and you understand how his answer was much better than yours. You look back and you secretly thank him for changing your path or your calling or your heart. You thank him for removing certain people and opportunities from your life because now you know how toxic they could have been. Now you know what’s right for you and what you deserve and that’s something God knew all along.

Sometimes it’s a blessing that you didn’t get what you prayed for because that means that God has better plans for you and his blessings will exceed everything you once prayed for. When you figure out God’s vision behind your unanswered prayers, you will understand that sometimes he protects you from yourself.

Happy Easter guys, and don’t forget you are victorious, loved, and ascended.

Bless.

Much credit to Rania Naim.

Don’t Let Rejection Keep You Down

According to Carolyn Joyce, Rejection is an almost unavoidable aspect of being human. We all face rejection in our daily lives, be it relationship, job offers, promotion, or other reasons. We all experience it, and yet, those times when we do are often the times we feel the most alone, outcast, and unwanted.

 In fact, so much of the hurt and struggle we endure isn’t even based on the loss itself but on what we tell ourselves about the experience, the cruel ways we put ourselves down or flood ourselves with hopeless thoughts about the future.

When disappointment or rejection knocks you down, get back up and go again. No time for slippery, but keep moving. We give in to rejection and disappointment so easily when our dreams does not come to pass or go the way we planned it to be. We need to understand that just as God supernaturally opens doors, sometimes God supernaturally closes it. And when God closes a door, it’s always because He has something better in store. So just because the end of the road came early in your life or rather you’ve come to a dead end, that’s not the time to give up.

You know what?

Take a different route and keep going.

Often, out of the dreadful rejection comes our greatest direction. So when you come to the end of the road, or something you have been working on didn’t come through, instead of seeing that as the end, regard that as God nudging you into a better direction. It will be annoying and uncomfortable; and we may not like it. But we cannot make the mistake of just sitting back and settling where we are.

NB: If we can embrace this idea that life is flexible and that losses offer us opportunity, we can grow more within ourselves and suffer less when we experience a rejection.

Shift your perceptive!

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Stuck? Why We May Not Always Understand God’s Decisions But They’re Always In Our Favour

We may not always understand the way God shapes our lives, we may not always understand why he sometimes chooses to teach us the hard way and we may not always understand why he simply delays our wishes, our prayers or our desires knowing how much we need them, how much our heart aches for them and how patient we’ve been waiting for certain things to happen.

We may not always understand what he’s trying to teach us but somehow all the pain we went through, all the things we’ve been tested on and all the setbacks and the delayed prayers make us better people, they make us more resilient, more grateful and they make us wiser and stronger. They teach us how to adapt to unfamiliar situations, how to roam new roads calmly, and how to fight harder for the things we truly want.

We may not always understand heartbreak, why God made us fall for people who broke us or betrayed us. Why he moved our hearts for people who took us for granted or were too selfish to give us the love we were looking for and we may not always understand why he didn’t change our feelings before we fell too hard and why it was hard to forget the people who hurt us most but eventually we learn how to live again without them, we learn what we deserve and we learn how to love ourselves a little bit more so we don’t allow others to diminish our value or decide our worth. Eventually, we learn how to be alone because more often than not, we will have to fight the toughest battles alone, and more often than not, we will climb the steepest mountains alone.

We may not always understand loss or grief, why we lose our loved ones too soon, or why life separates us from the people we need the most. We may not always understand how our worst nightmares are good for us or essential for our growth but we end up learning that sometimes those tragedies are the turning point in our lives, the incidents that shook us also changed the way we live, changed our character and changed our perspective; how we look at life and how we look at people. We end up learning that when some things die inside of us, we become fearless and somehow pursue everything that used to scare us and we start going after the things that we kept postponing.

We may not always understand God’s decisions even if they cause us pain, confusion, or heartbreak but they’re always in our favor even if we can’t see it yet. Time will always reveal the truth and connect the dots so we can see that everything we questioned was exactly what needed to happen so we can get to a much better place and get a much greater reward than what we had originally planned for.

Source: Rania Naim

True Story: Battling Addiction is a Life-Long and Difficult Struggle- Ben Affleck

silhouette of man standing on mountain peak

We all have that one thing we are addicted to. No addiction is small nor big. So far, it affects us one way or the other, it is bad. Addiction can take a lot from us but it’s best we find a solution and try to quit the habit. It is not an easy ride but eventually, it is worth the battle.

Ben Affleck is a Hollywood superstar. Ben Affleck’s life story is a motivational one for all the people fighting their addiction. He understands the difficult struggle, a dedicated person goes through to get rid of their addiction. Ben Affleck’s life story with his wife Jennifer garner can be an inspiration for you and might light a spark in you to change and improve your life for the better.

It is hard for one to put up with an addicted person. But it takes courage and support to help them mentally and physically. Ben Affleck’s ex-wife Jennifer watched him suffer for 13 years. She reportedly seemed visibly shaken after meeting with Affleck.

His drinking problem had become life or death. They have really worked on their marriage and they just couldn’t do it anymore. These words spread all around.

I never thought I was going to get divorced. I didn’t want to get divorced. I really did not want to be a split family. It was quite upsetting because it meant I wasn’t who I thought I was, and that was so disappointing and so painful, and people’s reaction about am I serious about my recovery? was absolute not. They advised Jenn to set her boundaries.  I really don’t want my children to pay for what I did. You’re trying to do right by your kids and you’re trying to protect them. You could tell you still love her when you just talked about her- Ben

Jennifer supported me in every step. “You know It’s bad enough absolutely. It’s hard enough.” Jennifer to the paparazzi.

Jennifer always wanted to raise a happy family like her parents. How could she give their kids that feeling and freedom and joy? but after her first marriage fell apart, Jennifer thought she’d missed her chance.

So, when Jennifer fell for Ben Affleck, she finally got her second chance at true love and when they got married a year later, Jennifer vowed she would make it work no matter what. How things are going mommyhood is going. It’s like the most, it just gets better and better for the next decade, Jennifer and Ben were Hollywood’s IT couple. Jennifer helped Ben clean up his playboy image and focus on his work. Ben Affleck, Argo.

I, always and still thank my wife for being the reason I’m standing here, I adore her, I love her so much. She is my everything. I thank her for working on our marriage for 10 Christmases. It’s work, but it is the best kind of work and there’s no one other than Jennifer, I’d rather work with. They looked like the picture-perfect family on the outside but ben’s long battle with sobriety had taken a dark turn.

Jennifer tried desperately to cling to the broken marriage, but it was too late.

In 2015, the couple announced their separation.

She realized, “I can’t go down this rabbit hole.” She just shut it all out. I was like “you don’t care about me, how could you not care for us?” she’s like, “no, actually it’s the opposite. I care too much, it’s too painful.”

But little did we know, it was about to get much worse. what was the hardest thing for you to be honest with yourself about? That I was going to get divorced. I never thought I was going to get divorced, and I didn’t want to get divorced. I didn’t want to be the worst person,  I really didn’t want to be a split family.

The collapse of his marriage sent Ben down a dangerous path he was spotted receiving what looked like delivery of beer and whiskey at his home. It quite upsetting for me because it meant I wasn’t who I thought I was, and that was so painful and so disappointing.

Still feeling responsible, Jennifer rushed to Ben’s side Jennifer refused to give up on Ben because she knew her children needed their father.

You can’t buy parenting, you have to get down on the floor and play. Even if you’re a super busy mom or dad, you have to find time for your kids. She lost the dream of dancing with me at our daughter’s wedding, and if you see your kids love someone so purely and wholly then you’re going to be friends with that person.

But no matter how hard she tried, Jennifer couldn’t fix it. I was totally manipulating the rehab. 8:30 this morning I left the treatment center to play a 3 hour game of basketball. Garner reportedly seemed visibly shaken after meeting with me.

After sticking by me for 13 years, Jennifer finally had to let go and that turned out to be exactly what I needed to stand on my own. I really don’t want my children to pay for what I had done. Or to be afraid for me.

I don’t really have a choice. I have to be the man I want to be at this point. I don’t have any more room for failure of that kind.

Without Jennifer to lean on, I was forced to take responsibility. There are things that I would love to go back and change. I have regrets. I’ve made plenty of mistakes, some big, some small.

Once I had finally accepted my past, I could focus on my future:

Becoming the man Jennifer always believed I could be. I took the last half of the year off and I just got to be a dad. Drive them to school, pick them up, go to the swim meet, that’s where the parenting happens. It’s in the cracks, it’s in the moments where you’re just taking them back from soccer and they say something profound or they talk about how they’re really feeling about something. That’s the joy of it and that’s what I don’t want to miss.

Today, I continue to work on myself while putting my children before anything else and Jennifer may not have the marriage she always dreamed of but her children have the parents they need.

Addiction has its consequences that affect people around us.

The story ben Affleck and Jennifer Garner shows us that everyone makes mistakes but when you’re a parent, nothing comes before the safety and happiness of your children.

If you can just have faith in who you are and who they are as people, it’s so beautiful when you see it starting to come out.  you could tell you still love her when you just talked about her. Of course, she’s wonderful. you know, somebody who’s the mother of your kids, they’re going to be the most important central person in your life. That’s really admirable how you and Ben Affleck have both, it’s all about children first and being a team.

It has to be.

NB: Don’t get addicted to things. If you see a sign at an early stage, please try to prevent it. If not, it becomes a struggle. Everyone has one.

Don’t judge, be the solution.

A Reminder: Don’t Be a Slave to your Dreams

Sometimes you are obsessed with what you think your life would be like if you had all the things you wished you had. Instead of enjoying your life as it is, even if it is not comfortable. But surely things will change because the situation is not permanent.

NB: Even though you do not know if achieving them would in fact make you any happier than you are now. Rather than living in the present, and enjoying it to the full, you are using your vision of how much better you think your life would be, as a form of defence, so that you don’t have to face the reality of life.

I am guilty of this most times and sure you can relate also.

You are keeping the real world at a distance, by pretending that is only temporary for you, that at any time your life will change and your prayers will be answered. But if you stop chasing your impossible dreams, and focus on your life as it really is, you will find that you already have everything you need to be completely happy.

In essence, stop chasing your tail.

Everyone Has a Story in Life


A 24 year old boy seeing out from the train’s window shouted…
“Dad, look the trees are going behind!”
Dad smiled and a young couple sitting nearby, looked at the 24 year old’s childish behavior with pity, suddenly he again exclaimed…
“Dad, look the clouds are running with us!”
The couple couldn’t resist and said to the old man…
“Why don’t you take your son to a good doctor?” The old man smiled and said…“I did and we are just coming from the hospital, my son was blind from birth, he just got his eyes today.”
Every single person on the planet has a story. Don’t judge people before you truly know them. The truth might surprise you.

Your Life Becomes The Sum Of What You Tolerate

In an ideal world, life would amount to the sum of our intentions.

Good things would happen to good people; we’d be measured by our heart and depth and character.

While this is true to some degree — life is undoubtedly kinder toward those who are kind to it — the truth is that your intentions don’t amount to your outcomes. Just wanting something badly enough does not qualify you to have it, simply believing that you’re capable of more does not mean you will actually achieve more.

In the end, your life amounts to the sum of what you tolerate.

It is defined by what you allow.

You are treated as well as you allow other people to treat you. When you set boundaries or cut off contact with those who do not meet those expectations, you are setting the standard for relationships in your life.

You achieve as much as you allow yourself to pursue. You create as often as you are willing to show up, and to begin.

You grow as much as you allow yourself to feel uncomfortable. We often think that it is discomfort that holds us back from becoming who we want to be, when in fact, that feeling, once truly acknowledged, will point us in the direction that we need to create change.

If you are willing to tolerate mistreatment, you will be mistreated.

If you are willing to tolerate unhappiness, you will remain unhappy.

If you are willing to tolerate dissatisfaction, you will remain dissatisfied.

Your life only truly becomes your own on the day that you decide you will not — for another second of your existence — tolerate less than you know you are capable of having, doing less than you are capable of doing, and being less than you are capable of being.

The truth is that nobody else is going to give this to you.

Nobody is going to wake you up to this fact.

Nobody is going to sit you down and give you a power point presentation about your worth and potential, and nobody is going to strategize a way to make it a reality.

The only way it is going to happen is if you decide you are no longer going to be okay with excuses, empty words or broken dreams. It is only going to happen if you decide that you will no longer tolerate anything less than the outcomes you want, and the life you dream of.

Your life becomes the sum of what you tolerate, so stop tolerating less than you desire.

Guest post from Brianna Weist

Trust The Part Of Yourself That Tells You To Move On

Trust the part of yourself that tells you when something needs to be over. The part that tells you that you need to end a certain chapter and start a new one. The part that tells you when something has served its purpose. Trust the part of yourself that keeps waking you up at night nudging you to grow out of your comfort zone and try something new. Something bold. Something exciting. Something that will bring you back to life.

Trust the part of yourself that knows there’s so much more to you. There’s more to life. There’s more than what you’re settling for. There’s more to your life than boredom, discomfort and anxiety.

Trust the part of yourself that’s hungry for abundance, growth, inspiration and meaning. Trust the part of yourself that begs you for change. Whether getting a new job, moving to a new city, losing certain people to make room for new ones or just working on yourself and exploring new habits. Trust the part of yourself that begs you to leave certain things. The part that knows that staying any longer will do more harm than good.

Trust the part of yourself that believes against all odds that things will work out in your favor when you take a leap of faith. The part that propels you to break the rules and take the road less traveled and give up your security for a little bit to start a new adventure that could change your life. Trust the part of yourself that sounds crazy because a little bit of madness is sometimes all you need to pursue your biggest dreams.

Trust the part of yourself that just knows when something isn’t right or when something is no longer good for you even if it’s hard to admit. Trust the part of yourself that is pushing you to end things you’re not ready to end because this part just knows that something better is right around the corner but you have to make some space for it. You have to be empty first before you can be full again.

Trust the part of yourself that knows when it’s time to move on because that part also knows what moving on will teach you. The new doors that will open. The new opportunities that will come up when you take a risk. The things that will come find you when you declare that you are searching and that you’re free.

Trust the part of yourself that tells you when to let go because that means a new beginning awaits you and deep inside you know it’s been too long since something came along that made you look forward to tomorrow. Deep inside you know that you are in desperate need of change. Deep inside you know that you can’t live a new life if you are still clinging to the old one that no longer fulfills you.

Trust the part of you that knows when it’s time to say goodbye. The part that may not have a perfect plan for the future but it has faith that something big is coming along once start stepping out so you can reach it. Once you start driving on a different road to find it.

Guest post from Rania Naim about self Improvement and growth.

The Strength In Our Scars

Trace the scars life has left you in. It will remind you that at one point in life, you fought for something you believed in.


You are the only person who gets to decide if you are happy or not—do not put your happiness into the hands of other people. Do not make it contingent on their acceptance of you or their feelings for you. At the end of the day, it doesn’t matter if someone dislikes you or if someone doesn’t want to be with you. All that matters is that you are happy with the person you are becoming. All that matters is that you like yourself, that you are proud of what you are putting out into the world. You are in charge of your joy, of your worth. You get to be your own validation. Please don’t ever forget that.” — Bianca Sparacino

You Can’t Avoid Suffering, You Just Pick What You’re Willing To Suffer For

You can’t avoid suffering. You can’t avoid pain. It’s a given and life becomes so much easier when we accept that reality.

The more you care about someone, the more you’ll hurt when they let you down. The more you’re passionate about something, the more heartbroken you will be when you lose it.

Ironically, the things that bring us joy are also the things that bring us pain. The people we love are also the people who break our hearts and that’s the essence of life.

You won’t find something you love given to you freely without an ounce of pain or suffering. The journey to happiness and love is full of suffering and pain. You won’t fall in love with someone until you’ve seen them at their worst, learned how to forgive them and accept their difficulties.

Ultimately, we’re only fooling ourselves when we say that the things we love shouldn’t make us suffer but they do. I love my job but I lose sleep at night when I mess up and I can’t forgive myself for the smallest errors because I actually care about my performance.
I’m more sensitive when I have feelings for someone and more likely to take their actions personally. I love my friends but it hurts when we don’t talk as much or lose touch because of our responsibilities.

While the level of suffering is not the same for each, it’s still suffering but to me, it’s better than suffering at a job I hate or suffering because I’m with someone I don’t adore or suffering because I have no friends. In this case, I’m picking the things and the people I want to suffer for. I’m picking who’s worth my pain. I’m choosing the lesser of two evils.

But to sit there and say you can avoid suffering is one big lie and to expect that the things you love or live for will not make you suffer is also delusional because it’s always the things we love that have the power to hurt us, whether our careers, our friends, our families or our relationships and there’s nothing you could do that would change that.

Essentially, what you should be asking yourself is who’s worth suffering for and what’s worth the pain? Essentially, life is more about picking your battles rather than avoiding them.

Because you can play it safe instead of trying and taking risks and you can try to avoid pain or heartbreak by stopping people from getting too close to hurting you but you also miss out on living your best life when you shelter yourself from the tough experiences that could change your life. You sit on the sidelines watching life pass you by, which is the worst kind of suffering in my opinion.

You suffer more when you choose not to participate in life. You suffer more when you refuse to let the pain make you grow. You suffer more when you shut people out. You suffer more when you lead a lonely and banal life.

This is a guest post.