This Week’s Top Post: 5 Points on Toxic Mindsets That You Need to Get Rid Of

Before I begin, I want to congratulate you all for making it to November 2022. I say Happy new month guys. It’s been a while I posted on my space; well, we all know what the world says now with the current economic crisis. The best we can do is to pray and keep moving forward. This leads me to the topic of the week. Toxic mindsets we need to get rid of to live a better life.

Toxic mindsets are beliefs about our lives or ourselves that we develop from unfavorable circumstances, traumas, unresolved childhood issues, and failure. We start developing these mindsets and they grow with us if we don’t treat them right away. They have the power to ruin our lives or hold us back from living the life we want or achieving our goals.

1. You are not good enough.

One of the most common toxic mindsets is the belief that we’re not good enough for something, whether it’s a certain university or a job or a relationship, because at some point in our lives we wanted something so badly and we didn’t get it or it went to someone else, thus it became second nature to fear not getting something we want because we don’t want to feel that kind of pain again, so we don’t even try. The truth is, we may not be qualified enough for a job we want, and we may not be the right person for someone we want, but that doesn’t mean we’re not good enough, it just means that some things are meant to be ours or for us and it also means that we still have some work to do on our own before we can truly be ready for some experiences. The key here is not to let that mindset paralyze you from trying and you have to feel worthy and deserving of whatever you want, even if you don’t get it. In order to change the pattern, you have to change your mindset, even if the outcome is not the one you want. It’s all about what’s happening on the inside, not what’s happening on the outside.

2. Everyone leaves me.

Another common toxic mindset is the belief that everyone will eventually leave you, and that develops from childhood abandonment issues or losing someone dear to you at a very young age. You start building walls to protect your heart and eventually reenact the scenario that the people you love will leave you and you’ll end up alone, so you sometimes sabotage your own relationships. This is more evident in romantic relationships where one partner is always in a defensive mindset operating from a lack of trust and always feeling neglected and abandoned by their partner. To heal your abandonment issues, you must first get to the root of how it all started and which parts of it are you carrying into your relationships. Are you triggered because your partner did something offensive or are you triggered because this behavior reminds you of an old wound that you still need to tend to? Self-awareness and introspection in your own relationships are crucial to start healing your abandonment issues and getting rid of the beliefs that everyone will eventually leave you or things will always end badly. Your relationships can end for many reasons, but it makes all the difference when you look back and know that you gave it your all and you didn’t let your own limiting beliefs or insecurities define that relationship or determine where it goes.

3. You have to struggle to get what you want.

This is something we were all programmed to believe, statements like “no pain, no gain” or “life is unfair” keep us stuck in struggle mode. This belief may sound good at first but the reality of it is toxic, because anything that comes easy to us makes us feel like we don’t deserve it because we didn’t work hard for it. This mentality stops us from dreaming big or following our hearts or our passion because we are conditioned to believe that we have to work hard and struggle to earn the life we want, and we often feel guilty if we are living a less busy or stressful life than our peers, so we try to fill our time with things that don’t excite us just so we can go back home at the end of the day and feel ‘productive.’ It’s not a one size fits all for everyone, and if you are happy with the way your life is, even if you don’t work too hard or you’re not always swamped with things to do, then that’s all that matters. How others view your life is not your problem. We need to start believing that good things can be easy and struggle free and our dreams can be achieved without pain or struggle.

4. You can’t quit.

Similar to the previous point, we live in a society that judges quitters negatively. We’re always bombarded with motivational messages like “don’t quit now, don’t be a quitter, quitting is for losers… etc.” but sometimes quitting is the best and only option for you. I’m not saying don’t fight hard for what you want and what you love, but when you no longer have the energy or the motivation or the desire to keep going, when whatever it is you’re committed to is making it hard to wake up every morning and feel good about your life or yourself, it’s okay to quit. It’s okay to quit the job that makes you miserable. It’s okay to quit that relationship that’s been hurting you. It’s okay to quit living in a city that sucks the life out of you. Depending on your situation, sometimes staying is more toxic than quitting.

5. You have to be the bigger person.

Last but not least, learning how to be the bigger person was the way most of us were raised, but truthfully, it can be extremely toxic in some situations and with some people who cross the line and poison our lives. Being the bigger person doesn’t work with everyone because we are better off without some people in our lives. Cutting ties with friends or partners who constantly disrespect you or bring constant drama and problems into your life is the only healthy thing to do and being the bigger person in these situations will only draw in more toxicity and more unfavorable circumstances. It’s important to be empathetic, kind, and forgiving in some cases, but you have to draw the line and set boundaries with people who don’t have any or people who only make your life more difficult.

Before you cheer or comment on this post. I will like to acknowledge Rania Naim to allow me to use her piece as a guest post. This is an avenue to spread the word out there for people to read and get healed from these toxic mindsets listed. If you want to share, please go ahead.

Why Most People Close to You Get Mad When You Start Loving Yourself More

Hey guys, I know a lot of you can relate to this.

Some people get mad when you start loving yourself more because now you say no a lot more than yes. Now you use your voice and say things they’re not used to hearing from you. Now you know your worth and you don’t settle for the bits and pieces you used to settle for when you were still healing and figuring yourself out. Now you’re more aware of who wants to take advantage of you and who is lying and who is trying to trick you. Now you protect yourself even if it means letting others down.

Some people get mad because they miss the old version of you. The one they liked and got used to. The one they could easily manipulate because they knew that you would always be there, you would always put their needs above your own and they knew that you would always choose them over yourself. Now you keep choosing yourself and putting yourself first and it’s not serving them anymore. Now you don’t care if they abandon you or leave you or stop hanging out with you because you’re finally loving your own company and realizing that you’re perfectly fine without some people’s love and approval. Now you’re focusing on yourself and making things happen and it’s pissing some people off.

And it’s not always out of ill will or bad intentions but that one friend liked it when you would accommodate them whenever they needed you at their convenience and you never said a word. That ex liked the fact you were still hung up on them even after all the hurt they’ve caused you. That one boss liked it when they would belittle you so they could take all the credit because they knew you wouldn’t complain. That one family member liked it when they would blame you for all their failures and clear themselves from all their wrongdoings. It’s simple, people don’t like it when you see through their lies and manipulations. People don’t like it when you used to let things go but now you speak up. People don’t like it when you used to make them feel good about themselves but now you call them out and people don’t like it when you treat them the same way they treat you.

Some people get mad when you start loving yourself more because it means that you will no longer let things slide or be available to their disrespect or tolerate their behaviour, and these are the exact people who made you question your self-worth and made you feel like you don’t deserve more. They would always pull you back in their web whenever you tried to break free but nothing feels better than releasing yourself from this web and from their judgments. Nothing feels better than betting on yourself and winning. Nothing feels better than looking these people in the eye and they no longer get to you, they no longer intimidate you, they no longer have a soft spot, and they’re no longer on a pedestal. Nothing feels better than putting people back in their place and putting yourself first instead.

Your peace of mind and sanity is very important.

Fact: How You See Yourself Will Always Be More Important Than How Others See You

This is a guest post.

How you see yourself, how you talk to yourself, how you handle your defeats is more important than how others see you or what they think of you. It’s a lesson I keep learning the hard way, the more you look on the outside for validation, the less you achieve, the less you accomplish, the less you do because what others think of you, their words, and their judgments can truly paralyze you.

Here’s a fact that’s never going to change, there will always be someone who doesn’t believe in you, there will always be someone who judges you, there will always be someone who doesn’t think you’re good enough for whatever you’re doing, there will always be someone who doesn’t think you are worthy of their time and attention and there will always be someone who criticizes everything you do. These people exist in our lives, they can be in our family or our friends, in our circle or our work and you can never run away from them but the good news is you don’t have to.

You don’t have to listen to their half-hearted advice or their unsolicited opinions. You don’t have to filter who you are or give up on your dreams because they all agree that you won’t be able to make it. You don’t have to see yourself through their eyes. You don’t have to let them dictate whether or not you deserve love. You don’t have to lend them your ears when they want to put you down and you don’t have to engage in their debates.

Here’s another fact, at the other end of the spectrum, there will be people who believe in you, who encourage you to go for your dreams, to take on more challenges, to step out of your comfort zone. There will be people who see you as more than enough and overqualified. There will be people who brag about you and how proud they are of you or how lucky they are to know you. Like a pendulum, you’ll always swing between these two ends which is why you should never really get attached to any of them because how you see yourself will always be more important than how others see you.

Because if others see you as bad and you are confident in your abilities, it won’t stop them from judging you anyway and if others see you as good and you’re full of doubts about yourself, then they won’t do you any good either. There will always be battles you can’t win and sometimes these people may be right about you but if you spend your life trying to prove everyone wrong then you’ll never truly live. What’s more important is not allowing these people to get to you or stop you from living the life you want even if it means losing a few battles and people along the way.

Source: Rania Naim

New Post: Be Armed with God’s Grace And Light The World

Hey guys, this is a guest post.

There is a light within you, a light that has been growing and glowing since the day you were born.

Your Father in Heaven knew you by name before you were conceived; He knew the potential that was within you, the beauty and strength you would become. He knew that you would be made in His image for a specific purpose; He knew you would bring joy and hope to the world.

God knew that you would be imperfect and stray from His truth at times, but that you would always be welcomed back to Him. He knew that life would throw you both pain and challenges, yet He would allow you the space to choose what you believed.

Ultimately, He knew the thoughts on your mind and the beating of your heart long before you could even speak—and He loved you, will forever love you regardless.

And in His love, you were meant to shine.

There is a light within you. It is cultivated when you share the gospel, when you smile at a stranger, when you lend a helping hand. It is born of the passion in your soul, when you do or chase something you love, when you walk down the path He intended.

This light is your own; no one can change or destroy. It stems from your innermost places and stretches out from your arms and legs, to your hands and feet, to your fingertips and through each hair on your head.

This light is a part of every moment, and your every cell.

And sometimes it dulls when you chase the wrong things; sometimes it softens when you’re so focused on all that you’ve lost rather than what you have. Sometimes this light fades when you convince yourself that you are unworthy. But no matter what happens, how far you wander from the truth, or how alone you feel—the light is within you.

This light is who you are.

God created you for a purpose. And though sometimes you may feel so distracted, so off-path, so confused about who or what you’re supposed to be, there’s a reason. There’s a plan. There is something that will allow this light to spread in and through you.

You just have to trust. You just have to continue forward, regardless of the circumstances of this life. You just have to listen, even when you’re unsure of His answer. You just have to know He’s guiding you, even when it feels like you’re wandering in circles.

See, even when you’re afraid, or lonely, or confused, your Father is with you. And He is not leaving. So instead of believing you are incapable of shining, instead of doubting your inner spirit or the truth of His promisesbelieve.

Arm yourself with God’s grace, with His passion, love, and strength. Wear His truth like armor, and go light the world.

It doesn’t matter if you’re still imperfect (you’ll always be); it doesn’t matter if you fail or doubt sometimes (you will, and this is normal); it doesn’t matter if you’re not even sure where you’re headed (this is the part of faith that relies solely on trust).

But what matters is that you pursue a life that honours Christ. What matters is that you love with all that you have, and pour yourself into the people around you, the things you do. What matters is that you keep trying to live in His truth and walk in His ways.

So fill yourself with positivity, with hope, with joy. Learn about the promises He made and wear them boldly on your skin and in your heart. Step forward in faith and let your life be guided by all that you believe. Open your heart to possibility, to purpose.

Source: Marisa Donnelly

Guest Post: 15 Things To Remind Yourself Of When Life Seems Overwhelming And Difficult

Hello guys,

Raise your hand if this year has been rough. Yeah, I know. We’ve all had a rough year. Some of us have had a rough few years. Now, do me a favour and put your hand on your chest. Do you feel that? That’s called life. Your heart hasn’t stopped beating to keep you alive, so don’t waste any more of it feeling sorry for yourself. There’s time for everything in this life. There’s time to mourn, cry, to be angry, to feel indifferent, but there’s also time to laugh, hug, kiss, and dance. If you’ve been moping for a while, maybe it’s time you remind yourself of these things and finally start living life more fully.

1. You’re more than just your body.

You have a mind, a soul and a heart. The outside is just the tip of the iceberg. There’s so much more in you that people love than what’s on the outside. Put more focus on what’s inside and let that beauty flourish from the inside out.

2. You can do anything.

If you focus and plan, you’ll surely reach those goals. It’ll take work, but it’ll feel good to know that hard work and helping yourself was your key to success.

3. You’re the only person who can make you happy.

No one else can make you happy, nor can you fill voids in the happiness department with material things. You and only you can control your level of happiness.

4. Problems have solutions.

Take a moment. Breathe. Think. Analyze. Plan. Solve. You can do it.

5. Is your problem really that big or are you being dramatic?

Stop and assess. Don’t waste energy on worrying about something not worth worrying about.

6. Be thankful for your support system.

No matter how big or how small, you’re part of a community of people who love you. Appreciate them and give thanks that you have someone to turn to.

7. You’re not alive to impress anyone.

Life is not about fitting in or making people like you because of how you look or what you have. Social media is full of liars and the moment you understand that, the lesser you’ll feel like impressing anyone.

8. Do things for yourself.

If you like it, do it. If it makes you feel good, do it. If it makes you happy, do it. If it makes you feel empowered, do it.

9. Life has a long list of good things ready for you.

You may be in a rut now, but that won’t be forever. Life always gives us sweet surprises. Be on the lookout.

10. Failing doesn’t mean it’s over.

You may have failed 1,000 times and feel like giving up. That’s ok. If you don’t want to give up and know you want to continue persevering, that’s also ok. It’s not over until you say it is.

11. People love you, so why don’t you love yourself?

We have this tendency to constantly self-deprecate. We under-value and under-appreciate ourselves, when the people we know value and love us. If they can love you, you can definitely love yourself too.

12. Life doesn’t suck as much as you think it does.

If we look hard enough, finding the bright side to life isn’t all that hard. Count your blessings, literally. Write them down and be amazed. Your life isn’t that bad.

13. You’re not alone.

We’re all on this journey together. And yes, life can seem easier for some and harder for others, but a wise man once said, “the sun rises for both good and evil”. You’ll get a fair shot at the things you want, but in the meantime, rest assured that everyone is fighting for something. You’re not an isolated case.

14. Messing up just means you’re human.

Congrats, you’re not a robot, or an alien, or a fictional character. You’re a real, live person who stumbles. Dust yourself off and start over. It’s that simple.

15. Don’t deprive yourself of anything lovely.

Never deny yourself the opportunity to love, eat, dance, sing, cry, shout, etc. Go. See new places, make new friends, try new things. Life is short and isn’t meant to be rationed.

Source: Much credit to Fernanda

Just Be Patient And Watch How Everything Eventually Works Out In Your Favour

Guest post.

Just be patient and everything that once unsettled you will be settled for you because that’s how the universe works, you don’t get your justice or your closure or your answers right away and at times it may feel like the odds are stacked against you and nothing seems to be going in your favour but then it all just falls into place. The answer just comes to you on a random Monday morning. Your closure comes with a twist as you sit back and enjoy the show.

Just be patient because when you rush and take matters into your own hands, you can sometimes ruin the wonderful surprise the universe has for you. Sometimes we get carried away and we don’t wait to see how things will unfold for us because we’re too obsessed with getting the outcome we want immediately. We want to punish those who hurt us and get even with those who kicked us when we’re down but we don’t let the universe work its magic.

God is watching. God knows exactly what happened to you and who did what and what their intentions were and God knows how much you’ve suffered and he is fighting your battles behind the scenes. He’s not going to let those who purposely wounded you slip away without a few bruises. He’s not going to let all those months or years you spent in agony go to waste, he’s going to reward you with something you never imagined, something beyond your wildest dreams because that’s how God works. He turns it all around. Nothing will ever stay the same. The pain and the loss will eventually be replaced with bliss and abundance.

Just be patient and watch how your faith in God and his mercy will grant you everything you ever wanted and more. Just be patient and watch how God wins every battle you once thought you had lost.

Major credit goes to Rania Naim

You Never Know What God Has In Store For You, But It’s Always Better Than You Think

You never know why God picked a certain path for you even if it didn’t make sense to you or even if you thought that it was unfair or too painful. You never know why God made you fight certain battles alone or why he made you lose those battles. You never know why he picked someone else for something you wanted or a dream you wished for, but you should know that what he has in store for you is always way better than anything you could have imagined for yourself.

You never know why his delays or his timing or his plans did not align with yours, but you should know that with time, you are going to realize that you didn’t need what you wanted back then, that they were juvenile wishes or dreams from an unhealed or an immature version of you. You are going to change and evolve and your dreams and passions will change and you will thank God that you were not stuck with an old dream or an old story that would have been wrong for you.

You never know why God pushed you away from some people or pushed certain people away from you. It may not make sense at first, you may even feel like you lost an irreplaceable friend or partner or the love of your life, but you should know that only God knows what the future holds, and maybe down the line this friendship or relationship would have been toxic for you or would have made you suffer. You never know why God broke your heart or why he took the ones you loved away from you, but you should know that the reason behind every heartbreak is to somehow heal you in another way. Whether it’s self-love or inner strength or wisdom, one way or another, your heartbreak taught you something valuable about yourself or your life that you wouldn’t have learned otherwise.

You never know why God tested you with the things that meant the most to you or the things you thought you couldn’t live without, but you should know that every time you think you lost something special, God has something outstanding in store for you. Every time you go after a blocked road or a closed door, God has an even better one wide open for you. Every time you chase someone who doesn’t love you or appreciate you or someone who isn’t right for you, God is saving you from a lifetime of pain and regret because he has someone perfect for you.

The truth is, you never know what God has in store for you, but from what I have seen in my own life and what I have learned when my life didn’t go as planned, all along God had a totally different vision for my life, and now I know that what I wanted for myself would have destroyed me. You never know how many doors God is willing to close to protect you, but you also never know how many doors he’s willing to open to bless you with things you never even dreamed of.

Sooner or later you are going to realize that what God has in store for you is always better than anything you could have imagined for yourself.

Much credit goes to Rania Naim

Don’t Feel Guilty For Doing What’s Best For Yourself

This is a guest post.

Don’t feel guilty for cutting toxic people out of your life. Even if you love them, even if you had wonderful times with them in the past, you have to do what’s right for yourself today. Remember, even though you might be the person ending the relationship, you’re not the reason this has to happen. They brought it onto themselves. It’s their fault. Not yours. You have to do what is best for yourself. You have to put yourself first, even when it hurts.

Don’t feel guilty for putting yourself first, especially when it comes to your mental health. You’re allowed to be selfish. You’re allowed to make decisions that benefit you, even if they upset the people around you. It doesn’t matter if anyone else understands or respects your decision. All that matters is that you care about yourself enough to do what is best for yourself. You should never sacrifice your mental health for anyone else. After all, if they really cared about you, they would encourage you to do whatever you need to do.

Don’t feel guilty for disappointing other people, even the people you love. You can’t make career choices, relationship choices, or any general life choices based on what your parent or partner wants from you. You need to do what brings you the most happiness. There’s no reason to make them happy if it means making yourself miserable. When it comes to your life, your emotions and your opinions are the most important.

Don’t feel guilty for causing conflict. If someone upsets you, you don’t have to pretend everything is fine to keep the peace. You don’t have to act polite when someone is completely disrespecting you. You’re allowed to speak your mind and say what’s wrong. You’re allowed to call people out when they cross an unforgivable line. You shouldn’t feel pressured to stay quiet when you’re suffering on the inside.

Don’t feel guilty about saying no when your plate is full. Even though you have a kind heart, you can’t help everyone who asks for a hand. You don’t want to burn yourself out to please someone else. Sometimes, you need to let others down. Sometimes, you need to do what makes the most sense for you instead of running around, trying to entertain everyone else.

Remember, you’re allowed to be selfish, but this doesn’t mean you need to walk around, only caring about yourself. This doesn’t mean you should say and do whatever you want without any regard for the people around you. This doesn’t mean you’re allowed to disrespect your family and friends. It only means that you shouldn’t let people walk over you. You shouldn’t let others make your decisions for you. You shouldn’t assume family members and friends know you better than you know yourself.

Don’t feel guilty for doing what’s best for yourself. Don’t hesitate to do what makes you the happiest because, at the end of the day, you’re the only person you can rely on.

Guest: Holly Riordan

Image source: Adobe stock

Trust Me When I Say God Always Has A Plan

This is a guest repost.

Trust me when I say God knows what he’s doing. Even if you’re confused and you don’t know how you’re going to move forward or where you’re going to go, he will always open a new door for you. An unexpected door. A door that could lead you to a kind of happiness you never imagined. A door that puts an end to the hard days.

Trust me when I say God doesn’t take things away without giving you something better. God knows when something has served its purpose even if you can’t see it. God knows when things should end even if you’re not ready. God is planning what’s next for you because he knows that you need a change. He knows that he’s taking you to a better destination or guiding you to a more fulfilling life.

Trust me when I say God hears your prayers. He’s listening to you and he’s giving you exactly what you want but in his own way. Maybe his way is different from yours but his way is always the right way. When you ask for happiness and you find yourself drifting away from the people you love, he’s telling you that these are not the people to surround yourself with because they drain you. When you ask for peace and you lose your job, he’s telling you that your future is better somewhere else. When you ask for love and he gives you heartbreak, he’s telling you that you need to make a better choice. He’s telling you you’re loving the wrong people. He’s always answering your questions, you just need to trust his answers.

Trust me when I say God is looking out for you. It may not be easy to see at times and it might be impossible to understand why things happen the way they do but one thing I know for sure is that God won’t leave you alone in the dark. He will guide you. He will inspire you. He will rearrange things in your life so you can change your life. 

Trust me when I say God wants you to count on him. He wants you to learn that people are unpredictable and they change their minds every second. He wants you to know that nothing in life is secure or complete. He wants you to know that there will be times when you’ll just have to count on your faith instead of your logic. He wants you to go through enough problems so you can have enough wisdom to know that he’s the only constant in this life and he’s the only one who can truly heal you.

Trust me when I say God always has a plan for you and that plan always includes what’s best for you.

Credit: Rania Naim

Image credit: Adobe Stock

This Is Me Trying

I am far from complete. I am an unfinished manuscript, collecting dust on a forgotten shelf. I am merely half a canvas, splattered paint that is yet to be a masterpiece. And that’s okay with me. Why would I want to be complete? That would mean the world was done with me.

I have not been sculpted to perfection yet, my fine details are still to be sketched. I would not want to rush the process of perfection, I do not wish for my metamorphosis to be instantaneous.

I want the world to take its time with me. Mold my soul with patience and attentiveness, Lead me to walk through darkness when I am convinced there is no light. Teach me lessons that will shape me into the final version of who I am to be.

I care very little for immediate perfection. I know that society is obsessed with getting it right from the start and I am sorry if I come across as self-righteous, but you’re wrong.

Life is about living. Living is about trying. Trying and learning; never failing. Failing suggests that nothing came of it. There is always a purpose, always a lesson to be learned. This obsession with perfection will only cause you pain; I speak from experience. I, too, wanted everything, now. I almost demanded it, trying to manifest it at my feet. But that is not how this works. If you believe that is the unquestionable truth, you will not live. Seeing lessons as failures will only fill your life with frustration and misery. Perfection is only attainable when our manuscripts are complete. Perfection is within that finished masterpiece.

To live is to try. Those lessons you see as imperfections, they are the words that fill your manuscripts and the brush strokes that create your masterpiece. Trying is the meaning of life. Because we are human. Humans are not perfect. We are never always right and mistakes are what make us individuals.

Your soul is a constellation of imperfections. Imperfections that resulted from a lifetime of trying.

And maybe perfection is not attainable when we reach our conclusions; not in the way you believe perfection to be. Perfection is when you have learned and absorbed every possible thing that life had to offer you. Perfection is closing your eyes for the final time, accumulating every imperfection you collected over the years. Perfection is having spent a lifetime trying.

This is me being dedicated to trying. Trying to learn from those sweet imperfections I am committed to loving. This is me trying to enjoy the process of my chapters being written. This is me trying to live.

Source: Dakota Geduld

Image Credit: Adobe Stock

When To Let Go And When To Try Harder

Eventually, we all reach the crossroad of moving on or trying harder. While it’s difficult to go either way, the decision is what is more perplexing. Sometimes you can’t just let things be, and other times things really do just have to work themselves out. But how do we know the difference?

Well, we often don’t, and that’s the most important part. The process of figuring out what we can’t change and when it’s time to move on is the actual process of doing so. Because while you can’t change things when they are largely the decisions of others, your actions can change the mind’s of those people. How do you know when the universe will work it out and how do you know when it’s time for you to start ironing out the kinks? You don’t until you’ve tried.

It’s time to move on when you have tried to change things, but to no avail. It’s time to let the  higher being or whatever it is you do or don’t believe in figure things out– and have faith in the funny little way that life tends to bring and take what we need at just the right times. But regardless of where you are in the journey, you have to keep trying until there is no other option. And that’s what’s going to be so incredible and humbling about when you finally realize it’s time to let go. Because you’ve been down to your knees and you don’t have anything more to give. That is what is going to bring you to a place of having something to let go of. It’s only then that the universe will take over. Trust it. Do it. You will find the “wisdom to know the difference” at the end.

 

Most times, I tend to be lost and don’t know what to do, especially when have exhausted myself to make a difference in my life. Since I got to the UK, have been blessed and favoured to work with a popular multinational company. But it is not enough for me, because I want a better position. Since am a graduate of double degrees, I applied for a managerial position several times, I get denied each time. I told myself the net time I apply and still denied, I was going to leave. But I remembered what my dad always tell me. Be grateful for humble beginnings. If it doesn’t work there, let it go. It will work in another place and in due time.

Have moved on, so can you.

A Short Story About A Butterfly

Once upon a time, a man found a butterfly that was starting to hatch from its cocoon. He sat down and watched the butterfly for hours as it struggled to force itself through a tiny hole. Then, it suddenly stopped making progress and looked like it was stuck. Therefore, the man decided to help the butterfly out. He took a pair of scissors and cut off the remaining bit of the cocoon. The butterfly then emerged easily, although it had a swollen body and small, shriveled wings.

The man thought nothing of it, and he sat there waiting for the wings to enlarge to support the butterfly. However, that never happened. The butterfly spent the rest of its life unable to fly, crawling around with small wings and a swollen body. Despite the man’s kind heart, he didn’t understand that the restricting cocoon and the struggle needed by the butterfly to get itself through the small hole were God’s way of forcing fluid from the body of the butterfly into its wings to prepare itself for flying once it was free.

Moral of the story: Our struggles in life help to develop our strengths. Without struggles, we never grow and get stronger, so it’s important for us to tackle challenges on our own, and not rely on help from others all the time.

Guest Post: This Is For Anyone Who Feels Like They’re Never Going To Find Their Own Path In Life

If you are someone who is afraid that you’ll never find your path in life, that you’ll never hit your stride, that you’ll never discover what you love, or find a place that feels like home, or a person with whom you want to plant roots — please know that you are not alone.

The things about life is that it doesn’t happen until it happens. We don’t know what we don’t know until we do.

It is so challenging to exist in a space where you are a stranger to yourself, because it makes you feel like the road will never rise up to meet you. It makes you feel like there is no perfect career, there is no perfect partner, there is no perfect city to call your own.

The truth is that what you’re looking for isn’t outside of you, but buried deep within.

You already know your path.

It’s embedded into your cells.

It reveals itself every time you get a twinge in your heart, a feeling of resonance, an interest, a passion, an explosion of emotion.

It is present in every room you are in.

It is with you all of the time.

There is no path to find, because you are your own path. If where you are right now is confusion and uncertainty, then what you need to feel and metabolize is confusion and uncertainty. Through allowing yourself to sit with these feelings, you will emerge on the other side with clarity.

Too many people spend too many years seeking outside of themselves, instead of looking within.

They imagine that the perfect job will give them the right identity, that the ideal partner will hand them the life they always wanted. They assume that home is a place they discover, when really, it is a space they create.

You are at home within your bones, and eventually, you’ll begin to accept that you are where you’re supposed to be.

There are more potential partners out in the world than you could ever imagine, and when the time is right, you’ll find the one that’s right for you.

Your life purpose is not just one thing, it’s a collection of things, some you act on every day, some that won’t come to fruition for many years. When you’re ready, you’ll arrive at the intersection of your interests and talents and you will find the gift you were always meant to give the world.

You can’t rush this.

You aren’t supposed to have every answer on demand.

It’s not that you have to search your soul to know what’s right, but that you are developing your persona to fully inhabit and embrace all that your soul wants to create and experience.

You are already on the right path, because there is nowhere else you could possibly be.

Whatever you are learning in this season is what you need to learn. Whatever you are feeling is what you need to feel. Whatever you are realizing is what you need to realize.

Your life does not begin one day when you figure out every answer, it is a constant unfolding.

One day, you just wake up and realize it.

Originally written by Brianna Weist